We Are What We Are
by Kanon Mikaelson
Summary: Yuki recently discovered her past; her pureblood parents were killed and Kaname was hiding it all. Drugs are doing the trick for her disregarded grief, but when she learns Rido has inhabited Shiki's body, surly & disturbing behavior from Yuki seems to get the night class's attention. Kaname's 'plans' are put on hold when an immoral presence invites itself into the Kuran vendetta.
1. Dear Diary

_I wasn't always like this, you know. I wasn't always swallowing happy pills and wanting the world to go away. I wasn't always numb to feeling, incapable of putting on a real smile. I was Yuki Cross, the disciplinary committee bitch and foster daughter of the Headmaster at Cross Academy. I was determined to keep it that way._

She walked to the window cautiously as she peered through her curtains down at the cobblestone pathway to the gates of the school. They all walked at the same pace, same foot first like robots. The wind swirled around them, their slow steps making you feel like you were watching a movie. Her eyes were blank as her long brown hair fell over her shoulders. She hadn't bothered to cut it again, not when there was much more on her mind than just keeping her image the same as it always has been.

_It started about a month ago, when I went to the Hunters' Organization for a look at my files after the ones in the record hall burned beneath my touch. I was a vampire...and no one ever planned to tell me about it; my parents are dead, I am the lamb for my uncle's slaughter, and the man that's keeping me close is none only then the obstacle that's got me drawing a blank when it comes to my earliest memories._

Hanabusa looked up at her window and saw the young girl looking back at him as she slowly shut the drapes and turned to her dim dorm room. She slowly peeled off her socks, taking small steps as one by one her clothes came off. She unlaced her boots and tossed them to the side.

_I used to hear that the only evil you ever have to fear, is the evil that dwells inside you...the kind that spreads like wildfire from your head to your heart. It's just as terrifying when you've seen it in others all your life without realizing it. _

She peeled off her socks as the balls of her feet touched the cold wood floor. Off came her dress as it dropped to the floor with a light tap as the zipper hit the floor first. She dropped her lingerie as her toes were greeted by a freezing sensation when they touched the tiles of her bathroom.

_I'm supposed to be the good girl, I guess. Everyone knows me for the uptight prefect I am, the girl everybody thinks of as the buzzkill...but I can say I'm an individual. I'm not afraid to admit the filthy mind I really am._

The tub faucet switched on as she turned the handle gently causing it to squeak. She went to get a towel from her cabinet and stopped when she saw herself in the life-size mirror outside the bathroom door. Examining every inch of her bare body, she ran a hand down her arm.

_I figured for now...a good girl act is what's going to get me along, and my "poisons" do me good in cases of having a conversation. I'd never considered become a hunter like Zero, Yagari says I don't have the build for it let alone the strength. I bet Kaname and his friends would just laugh if I were to even think of trying to become stronger. There's a reason I'm writing this down. It's more of a reminder.  
If there's one thing these people have never learned, it's that everyone sees what you appear to be..._

Slowly, she sunk down into her hot bath and set her head against the blue tiles of the wall; she let it fall to her shoulder as she drew small circles of the surface of the water.

_**...but few really know what you are.**_


	2. Rose

She woke up to her own scent of mint and fresh linen as she opened her eyes to a cloudy morning out her window. She stirred as she moaned in fatigue. Her covers were in a large blue wrinkled pile at her footboard as she lied biting her nail in a rolled up tank top and underwear. She could never find the strength to get out of bed, emotionally and physically. She sat up as she rubbed her temple. Nightmares, that's all she ever had. Usually it was the same; a young girl bathing in a tub of blood and a male's voice asking her if she was happy with what she'd done. She always looked at him and smiled. "No," she would reply. It was not as scary as it was strange. She pulled herself up and ruffled her messy thick head of hair. She walked to her window and slowly looked down at the pathway.

What was supposed to be a quiet day of break was now a nuisance for her. The six people, in their trench coats with luggage in hand, were walking in unison up the path to the moon dormitories. She slowly rolled her head so that her face was to the ceiling as she watched them. She rolled her head seductively to the dark of her room as she got dressed. First she slid on long black knee socks, making her smooth, fair legs look longer. Then she put on her dirty old brown boots, that's heels she'd now colored black with a marker. She took off her dirty tank top and slid on a baby pink skater dress, followed by her warm and fuzzy creme cardigan.

She combed out her long brown locks with her fingers as she put on her fedora, keeping it tipped back off the back of her head. She put her hands in her pockets as she walked down the empty corridors of her dorm. Her heels clacked on the wooden stairs as she walked down to the front door tediously. Just as she opened the door, there stood Kaname. She looked him up and down waiting for him to say something. "Yuki," he said warmly. She smiled slightly. "Kaname," she sighed.

"Where are you going this early?" he asked. She hesitated as she scratched her head looking around. "To town. I'm picking up a few things for exams," she said. He smiled softly as she shut the door. "I thought you'd be gone the whole week." "Something came up...so I came back early to deal with it," Kaname replied.

Yuki nodded as she started walking. "Yuki," he called. She walked back over. "I came over here because I wanted to give you something," he said. She looked at him as he pulled out a small item; a rose in resin. She smiled slightly...remembering something he'd told her when she was younger. "They bloom every ten years...next time I'll bring one back for you," he'd said. _How _did she remember that? How is it that she can still hear his voice saying those exact words to her eleven years ago?

She looked at him and smiled. "They bloom every ten years. I remembered I wanted to bring one back for you," he said. She smiled and stroked her thumb over the glass between silver plates. "That's sweet of you. Thank you," she said as she looked up at him. She hesitated before she slowly kissed his cheek, sending a sudden warmth through his cold body. Her hand slid off his shoulder as she left and headed into town. Kaname watched her go as she disappeared through the main school building. Something was different...perhaps it was just her long, beautiful locks that gave him an odd feeling.

He still remembered how it broke his heart when she cut them off herself as a twelve-year-old. Yuki continued on her way as she tucked the resin-encased rose in her pocket. Takuma saw her walk passed the black BMW he sat in and rolled down the window. "Yuki," he said. She stopped and looked at him. "How was your break?" he asked. She shrugged as she looked at him. "Shouldn't you take Kiryu with you if you're going somewhere?" "I'll be fine. It's just a short outing," Yuki said slowly. He nodded as he watched her continue down the street, her booties clicking down the sidewalk. "Bye Takuma," she said softly as she shoved her hands in her pockets. Takuma slowly shut the window as he told the chauffeur to take him to his grandfather's estate. Yuki looked around, the cloudy sky making her fair skin glow with desaturation.

"It's going to rain soon..." she murmured to herself. She made her way through the crowded streets as she went into a small shop and looked around. She walked up to the clerk and stared at him. A few customers walked in after Yuki as they stared at each other. "What can I do for you?" he said slowly, recognizing Yuki. "I was hoping you could set me up," she said quietly. He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth as he nodded his head toward the back of the store. She slowly walked into the back of the store and then out the exit, where a young woman, possibly a few years older than Yuki stood smoking a cigarette.

Yuki approached her as the woman tilted her head. "...How many in your party?" the woman asked. "One," Yuki replied. The woman looked around and slipped a small tin box into a book for her. "You should see article 7," the woman purred. Yuki stared at her then slowly removed the small shiny box and replaced it with a fifty. Giving the book back to the woman, the woman smiled at her and began her route home.


	3. The Pills

_The feud_. _The_ _great Kuran feud_.

The dozens of bracelets on her wrist clapped as their wooden beads hit each other with every word she wrote.

_I was barely old enough to understand what that was all about when it took its toll on the people I loved. My uncle was in love with my mother, but she loved my father; I could even see it in old pictures. The three siblings dressed so nicely; my mother in the chair by the fireplace, my father with his hand on her shoulder standing beside her, my uncle looking down at her like she was everything to him. So why did he kill her? What did it have to do with me? _

Her dark doe eyes looked up at the cloudy sky as she tapped the pen on her leg.

_Am I supposed to say my parents did it for me? They left me here to raise myself while they sacrificed themselves to my uncle? My brother can hardly take care of me since he seems so overcome with depression when he looks at me. _

She scoffed.

_Or maybe that's some kind of silent lust. _

She shut her journal as she started walking. It was getting late, and she could feel the first few raindrops of a storm beginning to fall. She entered Headmaster's home as she took off her sweater and left it by the door. "Oh, Yuki!" Headmaster said as he saw her pass by the kitchen arch. She stopped and looked at them, not saying a word. Her and Zero locked gazes. Kaien smiled warmly at her. "I was beginning to think you'd never come out of your room. Well why don't you wash up? Dinner's almost ready," he said. She nodded with a faint smile and headed for the back rooms. She went into the bathroom and set her fedora aside, messing up her hair. She looked at herself in the mirror for a time; in the back of her head a male's scream rang. She closed her eyes at the sound.

She may have had her mother's looks, her father's strength, but she had her uncle's mind. She opened her eyes slowly as she looked at Zero, her bracelets rustling as her weight shifted onto the left arm that clung to the sink. "You gonna stand there all day? Kaien's called you at least twice, it's dinner time," he sighed. She blinked and nodded. "Let's go," she said, taking his hand and leading him toward the kitchen.

* * *

After dinner, she was washing the dishes; her mind seemed to wander as she looked out the window. She snapped out of it as she looked down at what she was doing; as she scrubbed the dish she held, she stopped as she watched a strange light red liquid slide off the plate and make the rest of the soapy water an orange-red. She frowned as she let go of the dish and the sponge, turning her hand over. Her entire hand was covered in blood. "Yuki," Kaien said. She shut her eyes and then looked at her hand once more. It was gone. She slowly looked at Headmaster, whom stood silent with Kaname; the door slammed shut, which must've meant Zero left. "Kaname and I have some business to take care of, stay here tonight alright?" Kaien said to her. She nodded bluntly and turned back to what she was doing.

Kaname smirked at her as they left. Once the door shut, she swerved her head sharply in the direction of the door as the lock clicked behind them. She left everything in the sink and turned on the light in the hallway going into the bathroom and shutting the door. She sat on the cold tiles by the tub as she tore open her tin box of ecstasy and poured out 4 pills. They had smiley faces carved into their powdery white surface and she grimaced as she put them in her mouth and swallowed. She let her head fall to her side as she closed her eyes. She opened them a few moments later and the drugs had begun to take their course.

The room was blurry and she didn't know where she was. She may have been confused and nauseous, but it beat being in reality. She could hear the front door closing as she tucked the pills away in her pocket, her hand bumping Kaname's rose. she took out the resin-filled container and looked at the rose. Instead of a dirty pink color, it appeared purple in her medicated state. "Yuki," Zero called. She swallowed as she set the rose on the sink and struggled to get up.

She came out of the bathroom and looked at a blurry Zero. "You want me to walk you back to your dorm? I don't know if you want to stay here tonight," Zero sighed as he looked at her. She shook her head. "I'll be fine, I think- I think I just need t-" She could hardly hold onto the wall.

She hadn't eaten anything at dinner, so the drugs must be reacting based off an empty stomach. He held her up as she nearly fell over. "Are you alright?" he asked. "I'm fine. Just _really _tired," she said with a weak laugh. He sighed as he picked her up, taking her up the stairs to the guest bedroom. He set her on the bed and turned out the light as he began to leave. "Zero..." Yuki muttered. He looked at her. "Can I ask you something...?" "Sure," he answered.

She looked at him tediously as she looked up at him. "Have you ever felt like you were going insane...to the point where it's starting to scare you?" she asked. He frowned and looked at her. "Sometimes...why are you asking?" he said a bit concerned. She just looked away as her big brown eyes caught a starry glint from looking out the window. He sighed and slowly continued to leave. "Good night," he murmured. She watched him close the door as her eyes drifted back out the window.


	4. Foresee

_I never knew what an ego was until I developed one. __But over the course of a month, I found out that everyone has __one...especially the people I love. But I wasn't one to judge, especially for the fact mine was a more serious case. __What __they're seeing is a young girl who can't even remember her parents, her first home, her start. She's so eager, so naive that __people find it pathetic. But I'm sure they'd prefer to watch me be fake then experience my real likeness. But __I can't say I was __chewed up and spit out by the Devil...because he would have swallowed._

She stood in front of her mirror putting on her uniform, combing her fingers through her sighed as she took her leather bag from her desk, not bothering to wear her tie today. She sighed gently as she dragged her feet down the stairs of the girls' dormitory. Her long hair seemed to sway with the lush oak trees on the campus as the wind moaned like a ghoulish beast. Two white uniforms were walking the same route, moving in Yuki's opposite direction.

The wind blew the hair away from her neck as Takuma suddenly took hold of Senri's arm. Her smoky quartz eyes met Takuma's green meadows first, both confused to see each other. Senri licked his lips as he watched Yuki approach. His brows furrowed as he smirked at her; she stared at him in return.

As the wind blew the hair away from his grey eyes, she dug her nails into her bag's strap and stopped in her tracks. She saw those eyes. Those eyes...that wished to devour her when he got the chance. Rido had finally come.

_The day had come when I was ready to blow. He was here for me...and I sensed it. I'm no vampire, at least not anymore, but I knew exactly who's eyes I was looking into. The ruthless blue and red eyed man that slaughtered my parents. And if anyone's going to be sacrificed...it's not me. Enjoy your stay, Uncle. _

_I do hope you enjoy the peace while it lasts...because revenge is literally a bitch._


	5. Town

She planned to do some shopping today. Yuki was in town with Zero, helping him with groceries as an excuse to do some looking around. He stopped by the Association first to get his task information, and as he did so, she had snuck away to the small antique shop down the street. She'd seen Zero buy weapons in there, seeing as it also acted as a pawn shop; she was not browsing for anything sharp or dangerous, but rather just looking for that one thing that would make _him _wonder. Makeup? Not in her variety. Lingerie? She didn't have much to show..._yet_.

As strange as it seemed, Yuki seemed to be the only one to notice that the smallest things could be the most intimidating to vampires; weapons were no threat unless they were spell-bound like anti-vampire defenses. She slowly walked in as the bells hanging from the door handle jingled to recognize her arrival. An elderly man stood behind the wooden counter, looking down at his newspaper.

He looked up at the young woman, not moving his head and his glasses sliding down his nose. He cocked his brow as she ran her hand over a fur rug, and she gave him a suspicious look back. "Can I help you?" he asked in a raspy, deep tone. She paused as she inhaled and moved her head in his direction. "Just looking," she replied.

He slowly lowered his head as he frowned at his newspaper. She looked over every piece of clothing, every book, every child's toy. As she scanned over a small pearl necklace on the jewelry shelf, she felt a presence behind her.

"Don't wander off," Zero's voice came. She rolled her eyes. "I was only 50 feet away, Zero. And I'm just looking," I replied. He sighed as he wandered off to the other end of the store to look at the old swords hung around the back wall. She stopped when the glare of the sun outside the windows beamed down on a silvery surface.

Her lips parted as she looked to the felt display that held the item that caught her eye. It was an old sterling silver cross necklace with a leather chain. She picked it up and smiled. It was so simple, yet so fascinating. She walked up to the counter and set the cross in front of the old man. He looked at it and then at her. She tilted her head as she looked at him. "How much?" she asked. He looked at me. "Twenty," he replied.

She took a twenty out of her jacket pocket and handed it to him. He handed her the necklace and she smiled faintly as thanks; Zero followed her from the store. "I thought you were just looking," he stated. She snickered as she unhooked the the clasp and held it out to Zero. "Well. I don't have very many nice things," Yuki said as she took off her Cross Academy pendant. She turned around as she held up her hair; Zero swallowed as he slowly put it around her neck and did the clasp for her. She ruffled her hair as she turned to him.

"We should get going...Headmaster wants us back at a certain time," Zero said abruptly as he started walking, pulling her along. Yuki smiled as she looked at the drugstore, eyeing the open back gate. "_I just need one more thing_."


	6. Demands

Slender legs, arms as thin as twigs, and the form of a small boy. That's all she saw in the mirror. _Not good enough_, her mind said. She clasped the silver cross between her back teeth as she looked at her bare body in the mirror, turning side to side. She brought her luscious locks over one side of her head as blinked. A knock came at her door, but she only ignored it. There it was again; she covered her chest as she turned sideways to look at her straight form. "Yuki," a husky, low voiced came. She rolled her head slowly in the direction of the door, grabbing her clothes. Once she was dressed she answered the door, shoving a hand in her jacket pocket. "Are you busy?" Kaname said, looking down at her. She shook her head. "You haven't been patrolling," he continued. She blinked and turned her head to the left wing of the hall.

"I don't think I have time anymore. But I hope Zero's out there at least," she answered quietly. "Is it exams? Perhaps I could ask Hanabusa to tutor you," Kaname offered. "No. It's more personally, you know..._trying to find out who I am_," she said, looking him in the eyes to see if he'd feel any guilt. Not even a glimmer. "I see. I miss seeing you everyday," he said, putting a hand on her cheek. She looked at his freezing hand and then at him. He smiled sadly at her as he took his hand away. A few girls passing by in the hall, whispered and glared at Yuki. Yuki glared back before she ruffled her hair.

"Well, we'll see. Things can always go back to normal," she said, with her usual smile. He nodded, his goodbye and walked down the hall, before her smile slowly turned into a frown. She put on her uniform, turned off the lights in her dorm, and then went to the main school building that Friday afternoon. The halls were empty, except for a few students standing off to the sides having conversations or waiting for detention to begin. She walked into Yagari's classroom, watching him get prepared for his night class.

As he jotted things down on the chalkboard at light speed, he sighed. "If you wanted a bit of tutoring you've come late, Cross. You seem pretty hopeless anyhow," he said tediously. "Well too bad. That's what I came for," she said, leaning on his desk. Yagari frowned at her as he looked at her.

She put her other hand on her hip as she tilted her head. "Did you misunderstand?" he said. She clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth. "No, but I believe you are. I want you to train me," she replied. He cocked a brow. "Train you? As in?" "As in vampire hunter training," she continued. He held back a laugh as he ran a hand through his hair. "That's cute," he chuckled in a low voice. "You know what else is cute?" she asked.

She took the eraser and erased the entire board, then tossing it across the room. Yagari's brows rose all the way up. "Is that I won't be leaving until you accept," she said, hopping up onto his desk. He rolled his eye as he shut his book and set it beside her, leaning on the desk on her other side. "Is that so?" he said. She crossed her arms. Yagari grabbed her wrist and then dropped it at her side. "You're asking me to turn you into a kick ass vampire hunter? I think you might as well go home," he smirked. She used her foot to roll his desk chair over and shoved him down into it.

"The doors in this place don't lock Yagari. You might as well say yes before I start stripping," she said, taking off her jacket. He was taken aback as she unbuttoned the first button on her white shirt. "Easy way or the hard way," she smiled. He sighed as he heard the night class approaching. "Alright, alright. I like your courage. Have your ass at the association tomorrow," he said. She smirked with a flip of the hair as she put her shoes back on and took her jacket. As she walked down the hall she undid the second button, messed up her hair and walked straight past the incoming night class. Hanabusa frowned as he saw her pass. "Don't tell me you actually made some poor guy please you, Cross," he joked. She smirked. "Say what you want. I just got my socks rocked off by the Eyepatch," she said smoothly, with a half smile.

Akatsuki's jaw dropped and so did Hanabusa's, getting a reaction for most from most of the night class students around them.


	7. Hunting Season

I entered the Hunters' Association with Yagari on Sunday as I looked around. There were men looking at me like I was food, except for one in the corner who was giving me a nasty lick of the lips. I turned my back on them as Yagari started walking. I walked close behind as I looked around; I'd only ever been here once before to retrieve my records. "So. When was I gonna get to know I was screwing a student?" he said. I shrugged tediously as I flipped some hair out of my way. "When you decide to try and give up on me. If you can get me through it I'll consider ending it," I sighed. He took me to a small white room, where a young man sat in a metal chair in wait. "Cross, Kaito Takamiya. Kaito, Yuki Cross," Yagari introduced us as the man turned to us. His dull hazel eyes trailed me as I stared back at him still following Yagari.

"I thought you said you had standards, old man," Kaito said. She rolled her eyes. "One of Zero's friends, I presume," I said as I looked at Yagari. He took out an old camera as he looked to Kaito. "I did. And I also used to have dignity," Yagari groaned. I crossed my arms as he unlocked a door and stood aside to let me in. I went in to see a room full of weapons. "Don't get too excited, it's an offer to trade your worthless artemis in for something a little better," Yagari said as he leaned in the doorway. I turned to him, staring him down for a moment before taking my artemis leg brace off and setting it on the wooden table as I wandered the room.

My eyes searched the walls before I paused. Didn't see anything to do me justice. I simply turned to Yagari and smiled.

"I can go without one."

* * *

_I haven't been to classes in weeks. __I told Kaien I had things bigger than my education to worry about for now._

She fell to the ground covered in sweat as she panted heavily. "Get up," Kaito snapped. She took a breath as her body shook with it and then somersaulted backwards onto her feet as he swung on her with a sword. She ducked it and kicked the back of his calf, causing him to trip over his feet. He caught himself with his sword.

_Yesterday I looked in the mirror. My arms were not the sticks they used to be, my tight stomach was chiseled, my legs were strong, and my chest was immaculately hewed; all to the point where I'd made every hunter in that place bite their tongues. __My training was at it's end. _

She dodged Kaito's lunge and grabbed the blade of the sword, pulling it from his grasp and kicking him back. He refused to lose; she tossed the sword off to the side as he made a grab for her neck, she grabbed his wrist and kneed his stomach. He grabbed the back of that knee and forced her onto the ground, pinning her by her neck. She drew blood from his wrist as she strived to breathe. "If you want to breathe, then fight me like you mean it," Kaito hissed. She growled as she dug her shoe into his crotch and then dodged his swing. She got up grabbing his shirt in her arch position and threw him to the ground at her feet. She struggled to swallow as she put her foot on his chest to keep him down. She shook somewhat fiercely as sweat fell from her chin and neck like a rain cloud loomed over her head.

_I finally had something to get me through every passing day. It wasn't just happy pill magic anymore, it was the thought of being able to fight for myself. Not having to think twice about handling a weapon or about my words. I was raised in a Puritan lifestyle, as a peacemaker by my parents...continued by Kaien. I was being held back._

Yagari came onto the mat, clapping slowly as she let Kaito go. "I have to say, I'm impressed with myself," Yagari smirked. She didn't even crack a smile. "You were just a bratty little string bean and-" "Now she's still a brat," Kaito interrupted. Yuki rolled her eyes. "Come with me," Yagari said as he gestured her to the door. Yuki took her jacket as she followed him to a room next door.

_I was capable of much more than anyone thought. I knew it, Yagari knew it...and so will that man._

It had cement walls and bullet marks like the training room. "It's picture time, smile!" Kaito said sarcastically. Yuki just watched as Yagari took out an old looking camera. "What's the camera for?" Yuki asked in a the low tone she obtained. "We need a picture so we can put you on file in case you attempt to use anything you've learned in here against innocent and/or monarchial vampires or any innocent citizen. Just so we know we don't have a mental patient on our hands," he explained. Kaito scoffed. "Serial killer. The girl reminds me of a lion cub; she may have the skills Yagari but she doesn't even know how to hunt for herself yet. She's a good girl," he said, crossing his arms.

Yuki took a deep breath as she walked into the shooting spot of the camera. "Then let's make it a picture to remember," she said. Yagari and Kaito's eyes widened. She removed her loose shirt from her slim torso, followed by her bra.

_I was not your little girl, not your princess, not your lamb for slaughter._

She messed up her hair as Yagari tried not to stare and Kaito took in every second's worth of this moment.

_I was a child raised in fear...and a woman to be born in blood._

Her hair tangled and rippled over her left eye as she looked to the side and then at the camera. "Take it," she sighed, placing her hand on her hips.


	8. Blank page

_I went back to classes 3 days ago. Back to the mess of exams and girls fawning over men who will never want them back. That was the usu._

Her boots clacked as she held her books in one arm, her silver cross that sat upon her collar bone catching sunlight. Students whispered, stared...but she didn't even think to look. Her mind was mostly set on one thing these days.

_I came back feeling different...not as in feeling prettier or stronger. I felt as if I had swallowed a seed from an apple of a malevolent snake. Girls my age think about things like love and how they look...what they want to be when they get out of this place. I can't focus on a relationship, I don't wonder if my hair looks okay, I don't know what will happen to me in the future._

Takuma stood silent with "Senri" as they watched the young, appealing girl pass. "So that's her, eh?" Rido asked through Senri's vocal. Takuma frowned. "Yuki Cross? Sh-she's a student here. In the day class," he answered his master. Rido scoffed. "Oh...she's more than just a student, Takuma," he answered. As she passed her eyes slowly met his.

_All I know is that I'm gonna make one less problem for myself. All I need is an open door._

Yuki didn't so much as glance before looking away as if the young man were just air. Rido's smirk lessened as she kept walking. "Leave her be...Lord Rido. She's important to Kaname," Takuma warned. Rido gave him a sarcastic look. "And that's stopping me how?" he chuckled. Yuki scratched the side of her head as she headed for classes. She whipped around as she felt Zero trailing her. "Where have you been?" they said simultaneously, Yuki seeming to mock him. "You dropped out of classes," Zero said. She blinked. "Headmaster wants to talk with you." "And is that why you're here?" she said in a smooth, nonchalant tone. "I didn't think you'd care," she said, a small glint appearing in her eye as she turned around slowly.

He grabbed her shoulder and pulled back as she turned to him fully once more. It'd be rude to ask what happened to her...being he could be able to happily compare her to a night student with her image. "What?" she said, interrupting his long browse of her silhouette. "Nothing," he said in a low tone. She quickly looked him up and down before slowly continuing to class.

* * *

She stuck the pills in her mouth as she watched in the mirror. She held out her tongue to view the happy faces of the little white pills before she swallowed. She heard a knock at her door, as she swerve her head. She tediously trudged to the door and opened it to see Kaname. She looked at him blankly as he seemed to be taken aback. As he seemed to start browsing as Zero, only a bit more thorough. "Yes?" she said, a little irritated. "Headmaster and I would like to speak with you," he said, snapping himself back to attention. She slowly moved her head into an upright position from its tilt. She closed her door and followed him down the hall. Going into Headmaster's office she stayed by the doorway, not wanting to sit down. The room was suddenly very bright...most colors looking different.

"You turned in your artemis. Why?" Headmaster said within the beginning of the small meeting. She blinked. "I don't need it," she sighed. "You're a guardian of the school Yuki. You must have a weapon with you to protect the grounds," he replied. "I don't need it," she repeated. She twirled her cross necklace between her fingers as her long hair slowly shifted back over her shoulders. "It's useless. I don't even patrol anymore," she continued. Kaien and Kaname looked at each other; she was being so straight forward, her voice so low and emotionless it came as a shock. "Yuki, please don't be stubborn," Kaname broke in.

She blinked not looking at him as her necklace's chain jingled as she dropped the cross back onto her chest. The walls had begun to morph as she stared straight ahead; the windows were disappearing. They waited for her to say something. "I don't need it," she repeated one last time before she slowly turned on her heel and left the room. Kaname frowned, Kaien stood from his chair. _So blunt_. "What's gotten into her?" Kaien pondered. Kaname was silent.

As she walked down the hall, she watched the wall lights turn the room purple, a lewd feeling beginning to turn her stomach.

Too many pills perhaps? _Maybe not enough_.


	9. Chores

"It's almost winter, which means we'll have to make room in the basement for the things we have out. I need you to organize everything, that will be your duty for the next few days, Yuki," Kaien had told her. Kaien and Kaname had gone out for reasons untold; Zero was to run errands and clean up around the upper levels of the Headmaster's quarters. Yuki dragged her feet down the wooden stairs, dust already working up her sinuses.

_Mmm look out_

_Look down, look out_

_Look all around you, girl_

She sighed as she saw a pigeon perch itself on the ledge of the back window.

_Shot down, shook out_

_Shake it all around_

She checked to see if the basement door had been shut before she began _her search_. She tore open boxes, shuffling through their contents; she looked over shelves, making a mess out of the top ones as she ran a busy hand over the surface.

_Shake it all around_

_Shake it all around_

She huffed as her hair tangled and stuck to her tongue after she'd tore apart the left side of the room. She stopped as she looked to the right. Boxes and old furniture she'd seen in the house as a child catching dust and most likely unwanted pests. She huffed as she took the hair out of her mouth.

_Mmm broke out_

_Broke down, kick out_

_Knock to the ground_

She used an old shard from a broken mirror to open duct taped boxes as she occasionally knicked her knuckles. She was growing tired as the object she looked for became more and more impossible to find. Soon she was kicking boxes out of the way, making it more of a mess than it was before.

_Too low, the sound_

_Break out, _

_And shake it all around_

She swallowed as she sat against an old armoire in the musty, dirty basement smelling fumes of metal. She slowly turned her head in the direction of the pigeons that gathered on the beams of the attic. She noticed it.

_Yeah, mama, shake it baby now_

_Yeah, mama, shake it baby now_

_Yeah, mama, shake it baby now_

_Yeah, mama, shake it baby now_

She quickly got up and stood under the string that dangled from above and tilted her head.

_Yeah, mama, shake it baby now_

_Yeah, mama, shake it baby now_

Within a matter of seconds she'd jumped onto the joist, swinging like a monkey as the pigeons flew off. She sat upon the wooden surface as she pulled the sting, a hatch swinging open. She snaked her way in as she turned on a flashlight

_Ooh sold out, push 'em down_

_Worn out, by this one-horse town_

_Move on, move round, move out_

_Shake it all around_

She smirked as the flashlight caught sight of a couple old anti-vampire weapons and even a few old yard tools. She'd found them. She knew Kaien had once been a vampire hunter, but she was not convinced by his reasons to keep his anti-vampire weapons so hidden, let alone keep them at all. He'd sworn off that profession. She moved up to the vampire weapons, petting the blades slowly before she turned in the direction of the yard tools. An old machete, a chainsaw, a pick axe. She remembered living in the woodsy areas before Cross Academy; the young lumberman that would clear trees away from the house used to use those tools.

She remembered how she'd watch the handsome boy out the window and wish he'd come to the door when he saw her watching just to tell her she was pretty. She touched the machete before looking at the chainsaw.

_Shake it all around_

_Shake it all around_

_Shake it all around_

"Yuki!" Kaien called as she heard the front door upstairs slam. She sighed as she shut the hatch and jumped down on her feet, heading up to the surface. Before she was gone, she turned on her heel and shut off the swinging light bulb, and shutting the door. Kaname and Kaien stood taking off their coats as she headed back to one of the guest rooms. "Are you finished cleaning the basement?" Kaien asked.

_Shake it all around_

She looked at him bluntly as she passed, simply stating, "We have a pigeon problem."

* * *

Song used: _Shake it by The Harpoonist & the Axe Murderer _


	10. Witness

_If you're going to walk on thin ice...you might as well dance. That's what an acquaintance once said to me._

She sighed heavily as she got up the next morning. It was a foggy grey morning, like usual; her messy hair fell from her shoulder as her bare body was greeted by the freezing temperatures of the house the second her warm comforter left her fair skin.

_I didn't really know what it meant until I discovered my true self...and what it pushed me into._

Her small feet with red nail polish gently crept over to the wardrobe as she chose a few clothes to wear that day. She blinked sleepily as she gently took her uniform from the closet.

_I was everything my parents, Kaien...all the people that "cared" about me feared. Who knew I was the body and soul of the meaning of "confused", "halfwit"... or even "fear"._

She tossed the clothes on the bed as she turned to the small mirror that her cross necklace hung over.

_I'm the secretive oddity in this school._

She touched its cold silver surface as she strung it around her neck.

_Leaving me alone with my own mind...is quite dangerous. I think about things that would get me punished and shunned. I think about sex and how it'd feel to be touched like I wanna be when I put those meds in my system. I think about blood...the taste, the feel of it all over you._

She wandered to the kitchen as she saw Kaname leave out the front door, her expression not changing. She looked to Kaien who looked back at her. "Was he here all night?" she asked in a montonous tone. "No...it seems this morning_- _a member of the vampire council was found dead on school property," he answered, a bit of hesitation in his sentence pause. Her lips parted. "Was it...a student? The night class-" Yuki started to ask. He frowned. Yuki's face flushed as she swallowed, stiffening. "Yuki," Kaien said sternly.

_But most of all..._

"If you know something...you have to tell us," he said. Her eyebrows furrowed as she made sounds of hesitation. "You don't have to protect anyone," he said as he walked over, placing a hand on her small shoulder. She shook her head as she looked at her hands.

_I think about what it'd be like...to experience both at the same time. Kill two birds with one stone. That is where my newest intentions lie._

"Shi-" she started to say. **"Shiki did it."**

* * *

"Excuse me?" Rido purred as he crossed his legs. "Oh, I believe you heard me, _uncle_," Kaname said as e face the window of his office. Takuma stood silent at Rido's side. "Now- why would I kill one of the many idiots that worship me? They are the ones who reinstate me as king, Kaname," he said. Kaname turned to him. "You murdered a council member in cold blood. _She _saw it...I am not upset with the fact you are going to be able to get away with an member's murder. I am upset...you made her witness such a thing," Kaname growled as Rido rose to meet his nephew in the center of the room.

Rido tilted his head. "You say...it was Juuri that told you this little story?" he snickered. "Yes. _Yuki _told me this...and never once have I not caught her in a lie," Kaname hissed. "I don't understand. You know, if that girl was out, alone at night, no defenses, I would have sacrificed her right then and there to my thriving, bloody passions. So why not kill me now, Kaname? Oh wait," Rido chuckled. Kaname grabbed his neck, the ground below them starting to crack.

"Kaname!" Takuma shouted. "I have no part in this...but if either of you so much as lift a finger on each other, it will not solve anything now." "Just think about it nephew. Question the personality of this girl," Rido said, ignoring Takuma. Kaname let him go several seconds later.

* * *

Yuki sat on her window seat that night as she looked out the window, twirling the thin silver cross between her fingers. She was not satisfied, not complacent. There was still so much to do. Perhaps she should visit him tomorrow. _Formally tell him what she'd witnessed.__  
_


	11. Able Murder

_She shook as her breathing quickened, eyes shut tight; she clung to a thin metal bar, hoisting herself up and down. She swallowed as she let her arms give out and plunged 10 feet to the ground, landing on her side. She groaned as she rolled onto her other hip. "Get up. 75 rep, from the top," Kaito sighed. She shook vigorously, whether it was out of exhaustion or irritation. Yuki gulped as she glared at him. "I have started over 3 times," she panted. "And you can stop when you reach 75," he said, placing his gloved hands on his hips. She sat down against the cold brick wall as she took out her ponytail. He sat down next to her. "You're not giving it your all. That's why you can't finish you know. A stealthy assailant can withstand anything," Kaito said as he lit a cigarette. _

_Yuki watched the end of the cigarette light up with golden sparks, grey smoke arising from the embers as he placed it in his mouth. "What do you mean by assailant?" she asked. "I mean...in the case you're to be a hunter. A good hunter could cling to that bar for 20 minutes, and easily do 3 sets while he was at it," he answered. She shook her head as she wiped some sweat from her forehead. "It's not a hunting career I'm after, Kaito. It's just being able to defend myself...and gaining confidence so that I regret less in the future than I do now," she sighed. He nodded taking the cigarette out of his mouth and gesturing to the bar. _

_"That's what holds you back. You are worried about walking away from this place with a feeling of regret-" He looked at her as he blew smoke; she blinked.__"So here's my advice: The only thing anyone should ever have to regret, is getting caught." "What does that mean?" she said with a frown. He smirked. "I see that look in your eyes; the wild one. The look that says there is someone you are trying to 'take care of'. I was just like you when I got to this place; this type of training was never meant for self-defense...it was for revenge wasn't it? Well then here's my advice; if you are going to regret anything, then regretting getting caught. Trust me...if you put your mind to good use...you'll hardly ever feel the remorse," Kaito advised. _

_She smirked slowly as she took his cigarette and placed it between her lips. "You're pretty smart," she said as she let the smoke out in a large fog lingering off her bottom lip. She put it back between his own lips and then walked up to the bar, taking one big jump and starting her reps._

* * *

She leaned against a tree as she watched him approach. Extremely introgued to ear what she had to say for herself, he made a B-line for the girl before Takuma put his hand on his shoulder. "So help me if you interfere-" Rido growled. Takuma unlatched his grip, as he watched cautiously. Rido walked up to her as she rolle her head to look at him in a bored fashion. "You must be her," he purred. She blinked as she watched him. "I could guess with those flawless features of yours. Not as weak as i remembered," he continued. "Is everythig alright...Senri?" She said in a hushed tone, a lewd look in her eyes. He tilted his head. "Couldn't be better, dear," he replied, mocking her tone. "I heard about the incident...about the murder on campus.

The way they lured him deep into the forest with their blood...kept him busy with an animal carcass...then hacked him limb from limb," she said with a smirk. He leaned on his arm, on one side of her head that lau against the tree. "And...why did i do this?" He asked. "To...test your strengths see if you could get away with sething no one would suspect you of doing. You hid the evidence well, and left enough that could point to your uncle. One being this scab on my head that that says your blood whip scratched me when you drew your arm back," she said in an explanatory fashion, voice lowering to a minimum.

She pulled her bangs back so she could show him the scab on her right temple. He smirked. "Very, very clever. I must say, you are like me in every way," he snickered. "Oh no...I am much worse," she whispered as his face drew closer. "Senri," Kaname's voice came in a warning tone. People stared as they passed by. Yuki and Rido held a hateful gaze at each other that was completely unwavering. Kaname pushed Senri back with a harsh hand as he stood in front of Yuki.

"Why don't you have Takuma escort you to classes?" Kaname growled. "Senri" sent a lustful look at Yuki as she held a blank face; as he left, Kaname turned to Yuki whom was already walking away, twirling her cross between her index and thumb. He walked beside her as she headed for her dorm room.

"I think it's best if you stay away from Senri for now, Yuki. He's been exhibiting some odd behavior...I don't wish for you to get involved in that," he said as he stopped her. She blinked with an innocent smile. "You don't have to worry about me Kaname," she said as her utterance faded to a whisper. She began to walk away, Kaname letting her long lock of hair slip from his fingers. "If anything...he's in my way," she muttered to herself as she left.


	12. Love Pact

I used my student key to enter my dorm as I looked down one end of the hall, knowing Kaname's slow approach as I jiggled the doorknob. I frowned as I twisted the golden key in the lock as I glanced at the doorknob. A vision of drying blood made me stare as I removed my orange-tinted, blood covered hand from the handle. "Yuki," I heard my follower's husky voice say beside me. I blinked a couple times before looking to the tall stature inches from my side.

He placed his hand on the doorknob to keep me from exiting the blooming conversation. "I need to speak with you," he said. "I'm busy," I said raspily as the bloody vision stuck to the the dark of my pupils. He looked at me with concern as he put a hand on my cheek. "Yuki," he repeated.

The way he was saying my name sounded like the title of a book he'd never read before. "Senri. What did he want?" "...Actually I need to speak with _him_," I answered. "What?" he said a few moments later. I scratched my head as I showed great anxiety with my countenance. "I just need to- It was supp- It's personal is all," I sighed. "You don't have to lie to me," he said gently. "Kaname. I appreciate the concern, but I'm not willing to talk about it," I stated, looking at him sadly.

He grabbed my wrist as I looked back at him. "Please tell me," he said. I stared at him blankly, needing a good minute to think. A thought sparked in my mind as I licked my lips.

"He said...he knew my parents. That you did too...but...that can't be right. You wouldn't lie to me like that," I said softly, sending him a look of innocence. He seemed to be at a loss for words. His dark, wine-colored eyes stared back into mine as my head tilted to my left. "Would you?" I said in a close whisper. He closed his eyes as he ran a hand through his hair. His eyes wandered to the cross around my neck as he straightened himself up with a whimsical smirk; I was prepared for the unexpected.

"If you wish for the truth, Yuki...I shall provide it to you. If you become my lover," he purred, putting a strand of hair behind my ear. I blinked with a sigh; _I knew better_. I stayed quiet before I smiled up at him with a solemn,"No."

* * *

She looked so young. Her hair was long and rippled like a waterfall down her back. Her skin was fair and looked like it could be silky at touch. Her large brown eyes fell on the ghastly scene on the floor, her rosy lips parting. She was bare, nothing to protect the fragile and flattering scene of her pale body. She slowly entered the room as she seemed to keep her eyes on whatever seemed to be occupying her sights. His eyes opened in the dark and the forbidding air of the small, stone-walled scenery. _I recognized those eyes...the ones that tortured my sickly existence_. She seemed to as well, as he gazed at the young, nude girl; a sharp blade swung over her head as her waves flew. The moonlight caught the rich of her auburn locks, the scene suddenly changing as a swarm of crows flew at my view of the stormy sky.

I woke up startled as I held the sheet over my tank top. "Calm down, I'm not going to molest you or anything," I heard a familiar voice say. Sweat fell down my temple as I looked to the voice's owner. Hanabusa was standing at my bed side as I pulled the sheets closer. "What are you doing here?" I growled. "Lord Kaname requested I come wake you. He's waiting for you in the sun dorm gardens," he sighed, crossing his arms. I frowned as I slowly swung my legs over the side of the bed, exposing the full of my skin tight tank top and underwear as he turned red and turned around. "Cover up will you?" he snapped.

"You can look if you want, I don't mind," I said as I stood up. He didn't turn around. I sighed as I found my weekend jeans and a sweater to wear in my armoire. "Hey...were you having a nightmare?" Hanabusa suddenly asked. "No," I lied, a smirk stitching its way onto my face,"just one of my usual lewd fantasies." I saw his face turn entirely pink and the tips of his ears a light red. I put on my cross necklace last as I messed up my hair and turned to Hanabusa. "Alright. Let's go," I said.

He lead me out of the room and down to the gardens, where I could see the peak of the swan fountain that cast water down out of the beak of the swan. There sat Kaname, waiting for me. I sighed heavily as I shoved Hanabusa back down the path we came from; he gave me a crude look as I rubbed my forehead walking towards Kaname. "Kaname. I already said no," I said as I walked up to him. "Well. I thought I'd ask again anyway," he smirked as he handed me a rose. "Do you even want me as a girlfriend? I'm not exactly relaxed," I said as I took it slowly.

"Just seeing you at least a few minutes is enough for me, Yuki. We used to be together all the time until recently. I just wanted to be involved in your life," he answered as he lifted my chin. "I don't think I've said it before Yuki, but if it isn't clear..._I love you_."


	13. Last Resorts

She accepted. She had no choice. He was relentless, he was in her way. She told him she loved him as well and meant it...but there was something dwelling in the deepest hells of her being that was a little bigger than a dark liaison. Rido was still at his best; but the only thing she had to distract herself from it was her low supply of pills. No matter what she was doing, her efforts to put him at a loss for action failed time and again. She now knew what her last resort of phase 1 had to be: _if she wanted to quiet this killing machine that destroyed her life...she had to voluntarily get in harm's way_.

She walked around the trails of the school's nature scene as she listening to chirping crickets and the sounds of the owls that hid in the trees just above her. She hummed in the quiet a soothing, dark tune as she waited in the dark of the forest mouth. Night class stayed in their dorms tonight...making it easy for him to slip out. She would wait...striving with confidence to say what she must.

Nothing hurts an omnipotent man like a woman with a greater prowess; especially in a case where she was a human girl against a pureblood man. A twig cracked as she blinked slowly. "Hm. Waiting for me out in here in the dark? My...how reminiscent of you, _Juuri_," he purred.

His breath was on the tip of her ear as he pulled her hair behind her ear. "There's a reason I am still here you know," she said raspily, the small glint in her eyes hitting his. He tilted his head as he leaned beside her on the tree. "_Still here_," she repeated. "How do you mean?" he asked, dragging his bony fingers across her jawline.

"I would have just strung a rope on one of these trees and been done with it. And one day that's what will happen. But you being here gives me greater purpose." "Do tell," he answered. "I have never felt so violated in my entire life...until you walked in. Just as I was trying to find myself again. You killed my parents, took my brother's happiness, and destroyed the thing I've been looking for my whole life. Freedom. So I'm going to take everything from you," she growled in reply. He smirked with a thin and wry chuckle.

"How brave. To have such dreams that you may never accomplish. You see-" He grabbed her chin harshly. "I am the soul of the governing vampire body. I have my golden links to the vampire world. If I want someone dead, it's done; I want them alive, they are brought to me as gifts. Don't let either happen to you. And if you dare try and call me out here one more time...I swear I will not hold off any longer on devouring you, _Juuri_," he hissed.

Spit flew off his lip as she stared back into his fearsome multi-colored eyes, seductively licking it off her upper lip. "You won't do it. Because you know I am capable of so much more, than your tiny little mind will let you believe. I'm only human Rido...but a human mind is much more vile than a man with no mortal boundary. I don't care what you think you can do to me; throw me to the ground, knock the wind out of me... or even steal my virginity. You're a savage Rido...but I'm a monster. May you hold onto that little warning," she said, leaving her mouth ajar from her last words and yanking her hand away from his collar.

As she began to leave, he slammed her against the rough trunk of the large redwood. "It's almost as if you're inviting me into you're little vulgar web of impurities," he snickered. She was still, emotionless; the woman inside her was holding her head high. He leaned into her as he pressed her against the tree with his strong body, his hands immobilizing her waist. He began to use his fangs to leave a large variety of "love" bites on her neck; she put an end to it when she felt blood leaving her arteries with a strong suction.

She was no vampire but she knew if she were to escape one...she'd have to think like one. With one quick bite into his neck, which he deemed harmless, suddenly tore the cold skin from Rido's neck; he screamed out in pain. She stared at the bulging aggression in his eyes as she let the skin fall from her mouth followed by spitting out the rusty taste left in her mouth. "You little whore!" he yelled.

"One hundred thousand sperm and you were the fastest, Uncle?" she spat. He grabbed her neck, sending her straight down into the ground; she felt the light-headed beginning of a concussion. She coughed as she smiled through pain. "Is that it?" she muttered.

His shoes dug into her stomach as her eyes widened with shock to the force. "You know...I was once like you, _Juuri_. So cocky and brave..." he started, blood gushing from his neck. "Oh yeah?" Yuki coughed as a bit of blood ran down her mouth. "Were you a 'whore' too?" she continued raspily. He used his shoe to position her face so that she could look up at him. She smiled confidently. He sat her up against a tree, dragging her by her hair.

His shoe had left a scab across her cheek and the long nails of her fingers that held onto the roots of her hair, gave her a cut along her left eyebrow. "That little pride you hold so dear...is the same pride that almost got me killed by your bastard if a father," Rido finished, letting go of the young girl. "This was your warning," he called, as he began to walk off. She snickered to herself as she coughed up a bit of blood. "Good night!" she called.


	14. Ecstasy

She came in quietly that night, unlocking Kaien's residence with the spare key. She turned on the light of the kitchen quietly and slowly made her way to the bathroom, trying not to let the sound of heavy footsteps echo through the thin walls.

_Twice I turn my back on you _

_I fell flat on my face but didn't lose_

_Tell me where would I go_

_Tell me what lead you on I'd love to know_

She held onto the walls as she blinked from the heavy glare of the bathroom lights. She stopped to look at herself in the mirror. Her eyelids were pink from her week's lack of sleep and the woundns on her cheek and forehead did not contribute to a vigorous persona. Her gaze was heavy and listless. She touched the sensitive surface of her cheek's scrapes. The blood that all but a few hours ago dripped down her chin had dried to a couple of scaly brown lines from the corners of her mouth. She wiped this gently, causing the dark stains to smudge. Footsteps approached as Kaien suddenly appeared in the doorway; she looked at him slowly. He froze.

_Was it the blue night, gone fragile?_

_Was it about the men_

_In wonder steady gone under_

Her lethargic countenance met his look of confusion and fear. "Yuki..." her guardian said in shock. Her lips parted with a thin sliver of saliva beteen her teeth. "I'm going to stay here...for tonight. Alright?" she said quietly as she slowly began to close the bathroom door. Kaien was soon left in the dim of the hallway, his heart racing as he stared at the door.

_Was it the light ways, so frightening?_

_Was it at two wills_

_One mirror holding us dearer now_

The sun rose with great grief, a thick cloud of stormy weather slowly moving in. Yuki did not come out of her room that morning. Kaien was in the kitchen cooking breakfast, looking zombified and struggling to swallow. Zero came in watching Kaien, expecting the superfluous vigor of his 'good mornings' that usually came from this man. Headmaster was silent. "Headmaster," Zero said as he came in, his uniform jacket in his hands. "Oh...good morning Zero..." Kaien said tediously. "Would you be so kind as to go wake Yuki...?" "I didn't know she was here," Zero stated with a frown. At the silence, Zero made his way down to the spare guest room as he knocked harshly on the door.

_Thought I had an answer once_

_But your random ways swept me along_

"Get up. It's Sunday, we have errands," he called. Silence emerged all around him. She did not answer. She stood in the bathroom of her room cleaning her cuts, hoping for the inflammation to fade with the cold temperatures of the water. Zero knocked one last time. "With or without you," he snapped.

_Colossal signs so I got lost_

_With so many lovers singing soft_

Slowly she turned to the door and set her delicate hand on its freezing surface, opening it with a small turn of her wrist. She looked up at Zero before going down the hall. Zero's heart skipped a beat as he grabbed her wrist and turned her to face him. "What did you-" he stopped. He used his thumbs to spread the skin above her brow, causing her much discomfort as she covered the cut. "What the hell happened?" "It's just a few scrapes," she said bluntly, heading to the kitchen. Zero grabbed her wrist when she reached the kitchen. "Don't," she hissed. "Who did it. Who did this to you?!" Zero all but yelled. "It doesn't matter," she said quietly. "It does to me," he retorted.

She gave him a warning look as Kaien put his hand on Zero's back. "I don't think she's ready to talk about it yet, Zero," Kaien told him in a whisper. She looked at them both as Kaien returned the gaze. "Yuki. Would you like some breakfast?" Kaien asked. "No," she replied. Kaien frowned. "Yuki...I don't think I've seen you eat anything in quite a while. Are you feeling alright?" he asked. Zero sighed out of irritation as he put on his jacket. "I'm fine," she said looking up at him. "Maybe...you should rest today. You're excused from errands," Kaien said gently.

She nodded and soon disappeared back down the hallway into the guest room. Zero gestured to her hallway route. "Don't tell me you don't want answers. She's hiding something, she's not speaking up! Have you noticed how-" "Zero. I admit...something is wrong with Yuki these days and I am just as concerned as you are...but I think it's best for her to come to us. She's obviously a bit embarrassed," Kaien suggested.

"I don't care. Either way...whoever, _whatever_ did that...is not getting away with it," Zero hissed, whipping around and slamming the front door. Kaien sighed as he turned to the hallway.

_Was it the blue night gone fragile?_

_Was it about the men_

_In wonder steady gone under_

She lied on her bed, holding her tin box of meds as she turned a couple over with her tongue in her mouth. Kaien stood before her door, taking close to twenty minutes debating whether to ask. Yuki got up to look out her window; with one sudden movement, the room tilted and she fell to her knees.

_Was it the light ways, so frightening?_

_Was it at two wills_

_One Mirror holding us dearer now_

Kaien frowned as he heard a loud _thud_. She lied on her back, the room spinning as she tried to sit up. Kaien rushed to her side. "Yuki, Yuki!" he said frantically. She clung to footboard of her bed as she sat up shakily. "I'm okay, I'm okay," she scoffed. "Just indigestion." "Ind- Yuki you haven't eaten anything the last few days. What is happening?! What are- Who did this?" Kaien yelled. _Hallucination set in; ah, the works of her so-called "ecstasy". _She looked to the doorway...watching a tall dark figure leaned in the white crowned decor of the entrance. "R-Rido..." she huffed. Kaien's face suddenly turned as white as a sheet. "What did you say?" he asked.

"What? Did you come to finish me off?" Yuki growled, her eyes becoming bloodshot to match the heaviness of her pink eyelids. "Yuki, no one is there!" Kaien said, turning her to face him. She looked back at the bedroom entrance for a split second...realizing the scene she'd just caused...the things she had just said...the way the whole situation looked. She breathed quickly under pressure as she pushed away from her guardian and held herself up on the footboard of the bed.

"I'm sick! It's just the flu...it's going around I'll be fine!" she pleaded with a touch of attitude. Kaien held her shoulders. "Are you sure? You were hallucinating..." Kaien stated. Her eyes met the shining silver of her beloved necklace across the room.

Her **symbol of vengeance** hung from the wooden knob of her armoire as she miraculously recovered.

A slick smile smoothed itself across her lips. "I'm perfect," she muttered.

* * *

Song used: _Twice by Little Dragon_


	15. Insomnia

He was living in constant fear. She definitely knew what she was doing. That night that he put her in her place...something made his strong stature just ache with a bad feeling. She didn't fight back, she smiled through the pain and laughed at him. _She laughed at him_. She laughed at the dark king. A girl with such cowardice in her heart that is surrounded by a wall of psychopathy; she wasn't going to mess around. He was not scared of her directly...but rather what she could do now that she was coming to her senses, getting stronger. When she looked at him, he saw pupils as small as the beauty mark hidden away by the corner of her eye; she often had dark circles under her eyes, like she'd never slept a day in her life.

She was relaxed instead of the common stiffness he'd get from his disciples; she talked to him like she was bored with him. She would aim to taunt him like a dog with a bone, making sure that he knew she had advantages as great as his own. _You see, I'm good at what I do. Label me as you wish, Uncle: a virgin, a bitch, a slut, a martyr. But you'll be wrong whatever you choose. The modesty of a virgin, the self-rule of a bitch, the allure of a slut, the common sense of a martyr; that is what I am. You? You only have your tyranny and obsession to keep you going. _Those were the words he could hear when she spoke; they were hidden behind every syllable.

Takuma came into his room as he stood by the door. "Kaname would like a word," Takuma said. Rido picked up the rose from the vase on his desk. "What is it about them?" he asked. Takuma frowned. Shiki's silhouette turned in his direction, but the eyes were Rido's. "About women. What makes it alright for them to make us look like fools?" "I don't understand," Takuma replied. Rido played with his uniform cuffs.

"I met this human girl not too long ago. I'd been waiting for years to see her again; When she was much younger I predicted she'd be easy to make use of in the future. I mistook her for her mother, whom by accord was once my deepest obsession. I thought the girl would be too artless for her own good; she proved me false. Through the angst and insecurity of her youth...she became my equal. She's sadistic, not just to others but to herself. She knows how to think like a savage. She's driven...by revenge. She's as omnipotent as I, full of intimacy and lust and native wit," Rido reminisced.

Takuma was silent. "I began to think this girl could be my ideal mistress...in fact I started to become aroused by her very presence. But she started to display a dark and belligerent ambience. I keep in mind the evil that she is..._that girl is a _ _monster_. She looks at me now as a joke. Her vengeance is aimed against me and she will not have mercy." "Is she a student here?" Takuma asked silently. "Hardly. She stays locked away in her room with the medication she uses to keep herself from breaking down. Hence her self-sadistic treatment," Rido sighed. "...Well. I don't know if she's a monster. She sounds rather human to me," Takuma began. Once Rido stood from his desk chair, Takuma stopped the beginning of his advice. "How so?" Rido scoffed, hitting Takuma's shoulder on his way to his nephew's office.

* * *

She stared out the long classroom windows. Headmaster had come close to sending her to a therapist, although she claimed she didn't need one. She still attended her classes, however it seemed Yagari was informed to watch her carefully. She'd see his one good eye drift in her direction every once in a while and she'd stared right back. As the lecture went on and on, she leaned against the wall tediously in her seat, as if she were about to lose consciousness any moment. Zero wasn't asleep the entire class today. He sat up straight beside Yuki as her eyes looked to every inch of the classroom except the front. She was losing color in her cheeks, her cuts were still outlined with septicity and the browning circles under her eyes completed her zombified, sleepless look. It was a miracle she'd brushed her hair.

Once class ended, she sat still with her eyes closed. "Can you eat something?" Zero asked as he stood. She looked up at him. "Headmaster will be back late tonight. It's just you and me for dinner tonight," he said. She didn't answer as she stood sleepily. "Get some sleep will you, Cross?" Yagari scoffed as they passed his desk. She gave him a sarcastic look as he smirked. As she walked out of the classroom, she saw a blonde and red head of hair waiting against the wall. They looked at her and jumped. She just stared. "Please move," she said, looking at the wall. They did as told. She kept one hand on the wall for support as she walked.

Hanabusa and Akatsuki trailed them, which Yuki guessed was per Kaname's request. Zero sighed as he took a strong arm and held her at his side to keep her from falling over. "When was the last time you slept? I've heard you pacing in your room for the past several nights," he said. "I don't need to sleep, I'm busy," she muttered. "Yeah well, it wouldn't kill you to take a cat nap," Zero replied. She smack his chest. "Let go, I can walk. You make me look like I'm wasted," she sassed.

"And I'm pretty sure that's half the case," Zero retorted. "Lady Yuki," Hanabusa broke in. She turned her head slightly to look at her pest. "Lord Kaname would like to see you," Akatsuki finished. She felt Zero's grip tighten on the fabric of her waist. "Well I don't feel like one of his daily interruptions," Yuki sighed. "You can't deny his request," Hanabusa said. "I just did," she said as she took Zero's arm off her waist and started to walk ahead. Zero caught her by the underarms before she could collapse. "Lady Yuki?" Akatsuki said. "Go back to your dorms. She's ill," Zero snapped.

Yuki sighed heavily as she held onto the back of Zero's jacket to keep it from knocking her over. He set her down gently on the couch once they'd come back to the Headmaster's living quarters. She lied flat out on the couch as she went cross-eyed right before closing her eyes. Zero's jacket woke her up as it slid over the couch's pillows onto her chest. She started to head back to her room when Zero grabbed her arms and pushed her back on the couch as she tried to fight him off.

"Stop," he hissed. She glared at him. "Lay down and quit pushing yourself. You'll get sick," he said in a calmer tone. She closed her mouth as she watched him walk to the kitchen to start dinner. With a look of silent anger, she slowly lied down, her long brown hair spilling over the edge of the couch as she stared at the ceiling.

* * *

Hanabusa walked down the hall to Kaname's room as he turned the small object over in his hand. He hit someone's shoulder. "Senri" slowly turned to Hanabusa; Hanabusa was silent. Rido scanned the boy before him, noticing the silver chain peaking from the crease of his fist. "What's this?" he asked, sensing the girl's touch on the object. "I see. Ms. Cross's necklace...shall I return it to her?" Rido purred. Hanabusa frowned as he held it out of Rido's grasp. "You've done enough around these dorms," Hanabusa snapped. He continued on his path, Rido watching him go.

He was silent as he turned to the empty hallways and smirked, as he held the pick pocketed object up to the light, the sterling silver cross shining in the dim light of the hallway chandelier.


	16. Antisocial

_I started looking over my progress last week. I've gotten him under strict watch from Kaname and Kaien. Kaien, of course, voiced his concerns about the discerning injuries on my face and that I could have been attacked and not bothered to talk about it. But that's not what landed me here. I'm in my dorm room. I'm sitting in front of a young man, probably in his late twenties. He's studying my features, asking me questions I won't answer. I only stare at him with a three-quarter view. I didn't want to do this; there's nothing wrong with me, but Kaien suggests I just try it once. I can not console this man to leave. I ask if he could just come back another time, then I offer him a little "intimate" time, but I realize he's not going anywhere. My last resort is my own subconscious. If there's one thing I learned how to do, is to get someone's tongue in a knot._

"You don't seem like the...social kind, Yuki. Is that normal for you?" her therapist asked. She blinked. "No," she said bluntly. She sat curled up in her armchair, in her navy blue cardigan, light blue tank top, and little white shorts. "I see. And- What's this? A diary?" he asked. He picked up a brown, leather bound book with an angelic decor on it's center; she nodded slowly. "What do you usually write about? School troubles? Family troubles?" "Family troubles. I come from a line of homicidal maniacs," she says, suddenly looking directly at him. He cranes his head back slightly, looking back down at his log. "I see, would you like to talk about that a bit-"

"My mom and dad were killed by someone else in my family. My guardian, Kaien. He just likes to keep my hopes up and tells me they gave me up for good reason. But they didn't," Yuki said gruffly. "How do you know this?" he asked. She went back to viewing him out of her peripheral view. He cleared his throat as he put the other questions he had ready for her away, pulling out a few blue sheets of paper. "Then, are you worried you'll become like the family member who murdered your family?" "It's going to happen eventually," she purred, looking out the window.

This man could easily say he'd found a patient much like ones he'd had rarely. She showed a sullen and self-protective personality in a physical sense; she was sitting with her knees at her chest and sitting profile, her eyes looking at him every so often without turning her head; the more questions she began to answer the more he was certain her antisocial behavior was dangerously active.

She had never stolen anything before but she had killed a bird before, on a scale of one to ten she was at an nine with impure thoughts, she didn't keep up with the news, she didn't like to smile, she didn't drink but she was at five to six MDMA pills a day, et cetera.

Most things you could say made her just the usual young adult with a deep angst, but it appeared by her detail that she was a more serious case. "Now...this is my last question. It's a riddle with no right answer, alright?" he told her, setting his ankle upon his other knee. "A family of four: a wife, two daughters, and a husband. They're a close-knit bunch, when suddenly, the mother dies. At the funeral of her mother, the youngest daughter aged seventeen, meets a mystery man. He's wonderful; he's handsome, mysterious, dreamy. And without thinking, the daughter forgets to get his number and loses him as everyone exits the funeral hall. Driven by the urge to see him again, the daughter kills her older sister. Why do you think she would do this? Why would it attract the mystery man?" the therapist asks.

"That doesn't make sense," Yuki answered, her eyes full of insight. "If the man showed up for the mother's funeral, why would he show up for the daughter's? Chances are he didn't know the oldest daughter. The girl would have killed her father next if not instead. The man would show for the father's funeral, but with the daughter the only survivor, all signs would make her a suspect. She'd never get to be with her mystery stud anyways," she noted. Her listener did not reply as she stared back into the lens of his _Prodesign_ glasses. He cleared his throat as he straightened out his tie and stood.

"Well, it was a pleasure to meet you, Ms. Yuki," he said. "Don't come back," she replied.

_And he didn't. I never saw that alluring shrink again. I remained in my dorm room everyday after classes, refusing to speak to anyone. Kaname came to my door a few times, asking me to join him for a walk, but I kept quiet. I eventually left my hovel, however, a week after my counseling. I was bone-dry and skinny as a rail, my ecstasy tin empty. Through impulse, I use the last of my money to get my meds...to take me away from the horrible world I know._

* * *

She was quiet the entire time, until Kaien shook up the peace with a simple statement. "I spoke with Mr. Hyame the other day," he said. "He suggested that we continue sessions," Kaien continued, leaning forward. She looked at him, swallowing the food in her mouth. "That's not necessary," she said simply. Zero watched Yuki carefully. "Yuki he seemed set on the request," Kaien replied. "Well, that's great he found my company so intriguing, but I don't need his help. I'm not crazy," she said, letting her fork down on the plate. "I never said you were. I'm just concerned with all the time you spend in your room. With where those cuts came from," he said. "You don't talk much is all he's saying," Zero sighed angrily as he took the plates to the sink.

"Well I figured that's what you wanted with all the secrecy being passed around and a relationship forged on a deal," she said in a gentle tone. Zero set the plates down harshly in the sink as Kaien went to a loss of words. She stood up when a knock came at the door. She walked over to the sink, gently pushing Zero away. He'd brokent he plate, and she watched with soft eyes as he finger bled when he continued to remove the glass pieces from the sink. She took his wrist and held it up; his heart skipped a beat as she licked the blood off his finger and purposely let it down beside her thigh.

"I'll do it," she sighed as she pushed her hair over one shoulder. He took his hand away as he watched her turn back to the sink and remove the last of the broken dishes.


	17. Exposure

"I'm sorry," she sighed. "Yuki. Why would you say such a thing," Kaname's voice said in disbelief. "This isn't a real relationship Kaname. I don't want something that isn't real. I didn't say yes to you on the account of a deal," Yuki said, looking him in the eyes. "Yuki-" "It's done. Maybe when your done testing my desperation, we'll see," she interrupted. "Yuki, I would never do that to you. I just want to protect you," he said in his deep tone, his palms cupping her pale cheeks.

She took his hands away as she left him standing in the Headmaster's front doorway. She shut the guest bedroom door as her own lavender scent filled the room. She lie on her bed, trying to get Kaien's old radio to work. Her hands suddenly started to shake uncontrollably; resolving she couldn't fix the small tuner and rolled over.

Her body started to thrive and lose sight of its emotions as she sat up, feeling her stomach quiver with butterflies and throat tingle with the need for a little attention. She heard voices getting closer as she dove into the bathroom with her shiny tin box in hand. She stood at the sink as she poured a couple of purple smileys into her hand and took them without thinking to use the sink to wash them down.

For the first few moments, she couldn't have felt greater; then she realizes the last time she'd eaten something was almost amnesic. She clutched her dresser as and the middle of her sweater as she fell back into the bathroom throwing herself to the sink.

She took deep breaths as she tried to restrain from letting her dinner escape her. A hand on her back caused her to scrambled for the tin box on the sink, but also to swallow the gag in the back of her throat.

A _woosh _of cool air struck her senses. "Oh dear," someone purred. She turned her head shakily as she clutched her stomach. Her eyes watered as he knelt down and smiled venomously. "Looks like your 'happiness' has a rotten lining," he chuckled. She swung on him as he caught her wrist.

"You little bitch, have you not seen what this has done for us? How are we supposed to finish this like adults if I'm treated as a dog on a leash and yourself as your own worst enemy? Are we not the Kuran family?" he whispered. She watched as he used his other hand to grab the tin box and flung it across the bathroom, making a loud _clang_. Their gaze was unwavering as sweat dripped from her chin.

"Clean it up...and I don't mean your heave," he told her, before the sight of blue and burgandy eyes faded from her view. She lie against the white wall as she reached for the tub curtain to hide the evidence. Footsteps approached. "What the hell is going on?" Zero's voice came as she clung to the rim of the sink.

She couldn't answer and it was amazing how badly her skin resembled a melting ice cube. Zero looked to the tub and its purple, smile-etched contents. "What are those?" he asked her as she lifted herself to her numb feet. He held her up as she staggered backwards and set her on the small sofa in her room as he took her purple friends and washed them down the drain; she watched with a pained expression as her horrific moment of side effects passed.

He sat down next to her afterwards as she lied back on her floral bedspread, emotionless tears painting her soft face with glimmering lines. "Don't tell," she requested in a cracked whisper. He looked at her slowly, a look of disappointment still written on his face. "'Don't tell'?" he repeated harshly. "Look what you've done. To yourself. You can't be alright with that. _I'm _not alright with that!" he exclaimed. He frowned as they sat in silence and she returned a heartbreaking expression.

"I don't know what else to do," she breathed, "I have never been so scared." His ring finger met the end of her skirt. "Of what?" he muttered back. She swallowed as she looked at him. "That the people I think about, that I watch over...will see me the way I see myself. Please..._don't tell_."


	18. Starting over P1

_Life...has fallen apart._

Her footsteps dragged one after the other as she left the classroom. She looked around with sleepless eyes and moved with prolonging locks.

_I could not find one soul I trusted. Zero gave me away to the Headmaster, whom no doubt told Kaname...considering Rido's recent release from advanced supervision. Takuma was now his only chaperone...and it was like watching a heinous man walk his docile dog. I felt like everything I'd worked for was not enough. I felt like just as I was gaining most of the trust, I had now lost it because of my little addiction. But couldn't they see that wasn't the problem? _

She looked around helplessly as she took the long way around back to the girls dorm room. She couldn't look at anyone. She clutched her school sweater tight to her torso as she held back frustrated tears and habitually checked her pockets for one last wandering pill.

_Rumors started off the word I was a "druggy". That's not what bothered me_. _People watched me carefully, to see if I'd try it again. I didn't...I knew if the case were I wandered into town, I'd most likely be caught in the act of a sale. _

She'd hardly made it back to the dorm, before her late night visitor appeared in her path with his "docile dog". She kept walking, but all it took was a provocative laugh to make her heart beat with rage.

_I've tried so hard._

Rido looked back at her as she turned in a slow fashion. Takuma grabbed Rido's arm, but Rido gave him a look of warning. "Thank you so much, Yuki," he purred. "For cleaning the mess. I've decided to reward you," he purred. Her gaze was dark, in which it even frightened Takuma. "I'll give you a few hours to get a head start. That...is enough time for one of your simple pranks, right?"

_But I'm sorry to say...that I'm not as strong as everyone believes. I am still who I was before I knew the truth. I am still a blind...dependent girl_.

She didn't think twice. She walked up to him with a deadened gaze, her jaw clenched. She didn't need those few hours. She needed that one second. Her fist blew across his jaw, and anyone could hear the crunch of bones from a mile away. Rido clutched his displaced jaw as she held her bruising hand. "How about two seconds?" she hissed.

_But let's keep that between you and me._


End file.
